I realized today that it doesn't have to be "just another day", but an opportunity to make a difference in life.  Time is all we have been given to do something with.  What about you???

Today I caught the end of Oprah.  The subject was "minimum wage".  How do those who make minimum wage make it?   My husband is retired military officer.  During our tours of duty, I ofter wondered how the enlisted personnel made it financially.  There was a time when my husband was an 0-4 or better known as a Major.  We had 4 children in public school and we qualified for free lunches.  For sure, if we made 48K and qualified for free lunches, then this means a majority of those under his pay grade would qualify.  I realize I have been blessed not having to go to work ( and this was a choice); my heart breaks for those mom's who relished the idea of staying home to be with their children but were unable financially.

 

To be honest, I have felt very sad, and an unrest resides in my soul since this afternoon. 

 

 We have credit card debt( because of our((my))own gluttonly, not much in savings(due to the credit card bills), we owe the IRS $3000, which will wipe out what savings we do have tomorrow and borrow the rest.  Yet my unrest isn't just because of my own stupidity, but because I have failed miserably.  We get these ideas we need this or that to make our lives complete.  They are only things!  Suzy Orman says "people first" things last.  I believe this is true, but I don't practice it. 

The more I live, the more I realize how few convictions I have.  I live with the premise of preferance.  And really there isn't much conviction in my heart at all.

Back to the subject-

I have a basement full of things.  I really don't need any of it except maybe my sewing machine that I haven't used because it is buried under all the clothes I need to repair that is too small for my daughter now by about 2 years- maybe longer.   I feel full of 's---' and I really need to evacuate all the crud in my life.

There is a cry in my heart only God knows.  Only He can interrpret the silent cries that sometime get labelled as "indifferent".  Yes Oprah, I know I have been called to this life for a reason and for a purpose.  That is also a cry of my heart that it will be revealed to me and that I don't wander aimlessly day after day, month after month, year after year.  I know I have been called to His purposes...and if I am not careful, I can get religious and parrot the right answers, without the right Spirit.